Diane O’Neal

Design Strategy for Conscious Cultural Evolution


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Lahaina: a lesson in Protocol and Right Relationship

February 8th, 2024
Scouting trip for grant-funded HPR community engagement initative










I didn’t realize the degree of devastation. the sheer number of houses leveled. the pain is uncontendable. there is no way to understand. and it’s in their eyes. lahaina doesn’t have stories to tell. it is the story.

I experienced, in my presence, the desire I represented to organize and create and produce - all in best intentions and the name of support - was infact, a burden of pressure for normalcy. a pressure for being ok, being able, being ready, that was beyond what the souls of this place deserved. and yet, the desire for normalcy also felt longed-for. why, God, must survivors of such tragedy, put any energy beyond tending to their own hearts, their own families, their own neighbors, their own land. why must they deal with any outside influence at all? pressures for normalcy were also coming from other, more impending and ominous directions - largely economic pressures. the land- and water-grabbing, the blame-shifting, the opportunists. what has this modern system turned us into? how much has it depraved us of our hearts and our souls and our dignity?

our duty to each other, to our brothers and sisters in tragedy, in their grieving, in their healing, is to provide-for. that is it. what are we best suited to do, to provide, to serve with? and how might we intuit and know these answers, without burdening victims with pressure to know and ask. how might we sensitize ourselves to the delicacy and subtlty of need, created from such incomprehensable experience, and mobilize ourselves for true aid? I will never forget the feelings I felt and what I witnessed while I was there, even 6 months after the devastation.

and while visiting the community hubs, I dared to think to myself how I wished to have what they now have. how nice it is - so many people around down at the beach, at the park. just together. its what I dream for: actual community. actual togetherness. and it hollows me to realize it takes this degree of tragedy to bring people together like that. and its not all smiles family baseball and shared kitchen paena style. they didn’t choose this. they didn’t choose each other, really. like fellow passengers on a flight, just waiting together for what’s next. and many simply don’t have other places to go.

//

I started protocol last night. asking permission for the trip, stating my intenion. immediately, “no.” I sat with it. felt into the request. moved back into a position of question and listen. what do you need? my request/ intention became to visit in order to listen and feel, to learn, to understand. (I couldn’t possibly.) and I let that sit for the evening. would ask in the am. it felt possible. safer. but 4:00a rolls around, and I’m up to sit and check in. I knew it was no. and I tried to sit with it, for a long time, wrestling with the implications of what a “no” meant for me. I had a job to do, afterall. I’m going there on someone else’s dime - my community’s dime - to fulfill a function. but it remained “no.” then when I asked “when can I?” and the response was “never,” I knew it wasn’t true... couldn’t be true, right? so I got into get-ready mode to go to the airport. but further hō’ailona at the garage gate - a stalled ticket and ominous voice: “proceed according to the guidance.” made me creep in my skin. I decided I would honor it. Russell is from Waimea, he’d understand protocol. and I thanked Hawai’i for the gift of a culture of normalized spiritual protocol/ practice. He said no problem, and I accepted it, and headed back home for an hour or so before heading into the station.

but back on windward side, I felt called to release my first ti leaf/ shredded ho’okupu to the ocean, to Maui. (the energy was immediately lighter after I backed off.) and though the wind of the bay made the ti leaf come back to this aina rather than float out and southeast, I realized that’s good - i’ll wash my fear and anxiety and the lack of courage/ confusion off and let it remain here. don’t want that near Maui. no space for extra -  the burdens of others. I felt silly for whatever mistakes I made and also accepted myself where I’m at. proud of my choice to honor my word & Maui’s boundary - and up for ambition of succeeding my fear, and all in service of honoring these things & the knowing. a chant felt in order, and I realized the sun was rising. e ala e. by the 3rd round I was in it, and prayer. and then God gave me instruction for the day: go to Maui. Energetically, Maui opened up, but was neutral in it’s invitation. Because Akua ordained. Maui remained guarded.

My understanding is that I needed to demonstrate my willingness to honor requests and to back off. Even at the ocean beach. I allowed the water to reach me. patiently waiting to be recieved. it took time. eventually I was. a toe kiss. I didn’t see whales that day, but there was a rainbow at the end. as I closed, I asked what I should take with me from the day - “don’t come back.” I wasn’t sure why. but I also recieved, “tell them.” I tried not to take it personally. down the road a bit more, I offered a chant of gratitude. TEARS.

the immense pain. the immesnse chasm between those who experienced it, and those who did not. I am regretful that my ho’okupu protocol was not more significant. not more thought out and planned. not more robust. i am regretful that i was not more firm in moving in right protocol from the planning stages. but i was gifted the chance to witness and understand with my own being, why we must move in protocol. ho’oponopono.






Lahaina Protocol Process:


tune in (establish energetic connection)
permission seeking-
(introduce self), state intention/ request/ purpose
ask: how I can be of service? what is needed?

the answer: permission not granted

honoring of answer, despite internal conflict and fears
release ti leaf to ocean, honoring where I’m at
chant to rise the sun
give gratitude to process
humility & willingness to not push forward

in daily prayer, Akua instructed me: travel to Maui
energetically gates opened,
Kapu Aloha approved
what to do there: listen
guidance for how to move/ be there: love






Prayer:

gratitude, and humility to be recieved by the land. request to be guided to the right people and places that Maui would have me know & hear about/ from. help me to understand and see so that I can best serve her and her people, the community of Maui, through our work and through this project. Kapu Aloha. mahalo mahalo mahalo.







Reflections:

the lessons in this experience, and the implications for operating in right relationship to people and place, particularly as a representative of an organization or with business intentions, are numerous and nuanced.

a primary lesson: proper protocol to engage in such an effort is to begin with a direct request to a keeper, kia’i, konohiiki or lineal kupuna, of that place, and all activity and visitation should have been planned under direct invitation. blessed are those lands and places that have living keepers, who hold the knowledge and fortitude to guide us all. 

the challenge of business, is that space is rarely created for moving within a grander awareness of what is right and wrong. business shapes its compass against its own objectives, and sometimes against the objectives and rules of forces and pressures coming from those controlling the pockets. decisions should be made according to the welfare of the ‘āina - the place - and the people, not by the pressures of money. this, the fissure. 

non-profit activity and grant-funded efforts would seem to create more space and be more aligned for working in right-relationship, but the pressures can remain: grants often fund specific activities, and those activities must be premeditated in order for the grant process to move forward and find approval. Deadlines and line-itemed expectations prevent flexibility and adaptability, as well as emergence, especially when changes aren’t linked to logical kpi’s and set metrics, or those reporting on the matter aren’t in an understanding mood.

A’ohe mana’olana - “There is no hope” // Ana loa na meho’a - “This method is too rigid.” (Ke’oni Hanalei)

one pathway for hope is prioritization of impact within business objectives, and in such, building impact process and metrics from the ground up, from the culture-up, from the place-up, and in direct and immediate context. baking protocol, amongst other things, into the process. 

we must leave space to ask - what is right - and learn to move in ways that open our knowledge of what that is, and make it possible to respond to the information recieved, be it what we hoped for, or not. business must learn to partner-with, rather than dictate from a one-sided agenda. negotiations do not mandate stark contrast of separateness. true pono solutions, in right order with harmony of a grander nature and movement, must meet all parties in truth and dignity. each side must bring their bit only as far as the table, and not across it. and recognition must be given for what land that table sits upon, and the ultimate provision allowing for there to be a table at all. 

to move in right relationship is to move in protocol. we must remember again.